Wherever You Go I Am Sure To Follow
by Chibi Tidus
Summary: Post Season 3: Xander misses Cordelia, and decides to go looking for her in LA...


Wherever You Go I Am Sure to Follow  
  
The night air felt cold on his face. He stood overlooking the small town of his youth, eying the busy people on the streets, enjoying their insanity. It perfectly reflected that which he felt inside at that moment.  
  
She was gone. Left, she moved to L.A. to pursue her great career. An actress, no less, would settle her dreams and hopes. But could she possibly pull it off? What if she needed him by her side, his support, and his love?  
  
It seemed clear to him that she didn't, but he wouldn't let himself believe that. Somewhere he knew he still loved her a great deal. He would still give his life to save her from any passing evil that graced these shores.  
  
Xander Harris stood pondering everything about his love, Cordelia Chase. She had left him for L.A. But she had not said goodbye, she had never even told him when she thought she was leaving. He couldn't blame her for being cruel to him ever since the night she found him with another woman. That would never happen again.  
  
Her long black hair and perfect figure hung in his mind. No matter what he tried, she wouldn't leave his mind. The love he felt for her consumed him, and the guilt he felt made everything even worse. The day would come where he would see her again, touch her lovely face, and hear her wonderful voice.  
  
But she really was gone for good. Never saying goodbye, it seemed as though she left their relationship in tatters for hope of a fresh start in L.A. He would move on though. He always did. If he could have handled her rejections before, he was positive that this phase would pass.  
  
It had only been a month.  
  
His heart felt sorrow, try as he might to make it forget. Forgive and forget. That was what he had to do. She chose her new life over this one and he would have to deal with that.  
  
Her maturity level, though it did increase while she was a Scooby member, never got to where it was supposed to be and she might not make it all alone out there in such a big city.. No. Xander would not just up and leave like she did. He has a stronger will and more loyalty to Buffy and the rest of his friends.  
  
The lust in his heart grew then. It swelled up from the depths of his soul and clawed at his brain. A month had passed in which he was supposed to be touring the United States, but he found he couldn't go. He had cleverly hid out in the local hotel and sleeping in his car since he "left". The sun was slowly rising in the distance, chasing away most of the evils that haunt the night.  
  
It would be easy to get out of this. He would just make up some crazy -yet believable- story that was just the right thing to say to the people that loved so that they wouldn't worry about his ware-a-bouts.  
  
So in reality he could leave and go anywhere, do anything, see anybody.  
  
Would that be right? To immediately run off and see your lost love after only a month of being away? What would her reaction be like? Pleased? Surprised? Would she be angry?  
  
Mind set, he started walking back down from his perch above the city that sprawled before him. Taking one last look down on his hometown, he felt a piece of him get ripped out right then. He would be lying to his best friends and sneaking around. At that point he didn't care.  
  
His old rusty car sat behind some trees at the foot of the bluff. He pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. After a few minutes of fighting to get it open, he set off.  
  
If he wanted, he could arrive in L.A. later that night. The problem would be tracking her down. He was sure he could find an easy way to do that though.  
  
The sun rose and set, and in between that time frame he went from Sunnydale to L.A. Somehow he found himself prowling around Malibu at sunset, cruising slowly around seeing all there was to see.  
  
He had his windows rolled down, feeling the ocean breeze ruffle his hair. He came to a stop at an intersection and saw out of the corner of his eye a brunette walking confidently down the sidewalk to his left.  
  
Hope flared in his heart as he spun his head to get a better look. But then he saw the red highlights, something she would never do, and she was shorter than the woman before him was. He continued through the intersection and started looking for apartment buildings.  
  
Not long afterwards he came across a group of apartment buildings. He stopped his car suddenly and pulled it over to the side of the street. He sat there for a day, watching everyone come in than out.  
  
Finally his wishes were granted as she appeared at a door. He felt a familiar sensation he had not felt in a long time brew in him, and he found himself reaching for the door handle before he knew what he was doing. Stopping himself just in time, he found himself contempt just to stay here and watch her.  
  
Her beautiful figure eyed his car for a moment, recognition in her eyes. Then she turned and walked away. He thought about following her down the block, and he even began to push the gas pedal.  
  
Something stopped him. Something about her walk. She was happy here, and he couldn't ruin it by bringing back old bad memories to her. It wouldn't be fair.  
  
Xander sat there staring at his lost love for as long as he could. When she turned at the end of the block and was gone, so was he. He left for Sunnydale and arrived there early in the morning. He had his conclusions; the end was finally here.  
  
Now all he had to do was spend the next two months thinking of a way for Buffy and the others to think that he really was gone. Maybe he could do something about the Grand Canyon. 


End file.
